Write to Recipient
Connecting to the recipient of your loved one's gift
As a donor family, you may decide to write a letter to the recipients of your loved one’s organs. This is a personal decision, and you should not feel any pressure to act in one way or another.
Sometimes, donor families choose to write to recipients to share information about their loved one and the decision to donate. For some families, sharing helps in the grieving process. All correspondence is anonymous, and identities are kept confidential. There is no time limit for sending a letter, and you may write at any time. Many choose to send a letter during the holidays, an anniversary card, or a “Thinking of You” card. Sometimes the hardest part is writing those first few words. If you want to write, but are having trouble or need more information about writing to recipients, please call our office at 405.840.5551 or reach out by email at lifeshare-aftercare@lifeshareok.org.
If you decide to write, here are some suggestions and guidelines:
- Only include information you are comfortable with sharing about yourself and your loved one. This may include occupation, hobbies, interests, or special things your loved one enjoyed. First names are welcome.
- Please do not share last names, geographic locations, phone numbers, email addresses, social media pages, hospital names, physicians that helped you, etc. Due to LifeShare’s confidentiality policy, this informatiovn will be omitted if included in any letters.
- You may want to briefly explain the circumstances that led to your loved one becoming a donor and how you made the decision to donate. You can also include how this gift has impacted you, your family, and community.
Other things to consider:
- Use simple language.
- If there is more than one recipient, you may choose to write separate letters or use the same letter for all recipients.
- Be thoughtful when using spiritual comments since the religion of the recipient is unknown.
If Mailing:
- Place the letter or card in an unsealed envelope.
- Include a separate sheet of paper with your loved one's full name, date of donation, your full name and contact information, and which recipients should receive the letter or card.
Once your correspondence is received, it will be reviewed by an Aftercare Coordinator to ensure confidentiality. It will then be forwarded to the recipient's transplant center, reviewed by their social worker, and forwarded to the recipient. Although we strive to complete this task quickly, this entire process may take several weeks before the letter reaches the recipient.
Will I hear from the recipients?
Keep in mind some recipients may send a response to your letter while others may not write back. This is their personal decision that could be made for various reasons. Many recipients state they feel overwhelmed with emotion and have difficulty expressing their gratitude in a letter, while others are continuing to heal and adjust to their new lives as transplant recipients. Most recipients have said that writing to their donor family is the most difficult thing they have ever done. Even if you never receive a letter, we hope you will take comfort in knowing that your loved one's gift has helped others. |
Will I ever be able to meet the transplant recipients?
Contact between donor family members and recipients and their families has been reported to be a fulfilling experience for all parties. However, before initiating such contact, both the donor family and the recipient should take time to explore their feelings regarding direct contact.
LifeShare will only allow direct, unedited communication between the donor family and recipient following an initial letter where both parties express a desire.
Share your story.
The gift of organ and tissue donation can change someone’s life and rewrite their story. Every story has the potential to save a life. Will you share yours?
Every story shared on LifeShare’s website, social media and traditional media helps us make a difference by encouraging individuals to register as organ and tissue donors. Your experience is unique and powerful and can inspire people to say “yes” to organ and tissue donation.
We work tirelessly to give more than 100,000 waiting for a lifesaving transplant a second chance at life.
Contact between donor family members and recipients and their families has been reported to be a fulfilling experience for all parties. However, before initiating such contact, both the donor family and the recipient should take time to explore their feelings regarding direct contact.
LifeShare will only allow direct, unedited communication between the donor family and recipient following an initial letter where both parties express a desire.
Share your story.
The gift of organ and tissue donation can change someone’s life and rewrite their story. Every story has the potential to save a life. Will you share yours?
Every story shared on LifeShare’s website, social media and traditional media helps us make a difference by encouraging individuals to register as organ and tissue donors. Your experience is unique and powerful and can inspire people to say “yes” to organ and tissue donation.
We work tirelessly to give more than 100,000 waiting for a lifesaving transplant a second chance at life.